How Do You Not Turn A Child Away From God?
By Mike Edwards
It can be disheartening when our child does not share the same beliefs or passion about God as they get older. I have good news if reading this and kids are young or grown. My kids are in their thirties. I have things I could have done better. I did apologize what I thought I could do differently. If a parent has any kind of relationship, kids will get over mistakes. If kids are younger, you can plan ahead. Decide if my plan below makes sense or develop your own.
Parents. communicate the real reason for a relationship with God
Many of us who grew up in church were taught the reason Jesus came to this earth was to save us from Hell so we could go to Heaven. Your kid isn’t going to Hell regardless of their beliefs. A literal Hell isn’t biblical. See here. Jesus spoke of loving God not to get into heaven but to receive help in loving others here on earth. See here. Personally, the biggest reason for being a God-follower is the forgiveness, inspiration, and encouragement I sense in striving to be a better human being. Influences in our life don’t have to be audible. My parents aren’t alive but I am still influenced. Pursuit of a godly life is never in vain! The best a parent can do as children age is less talking if not interested and walking the talk. If God exist, God can handle matters.
Parents, it’s their journey not yours
Many parents assume if their kid question, doubt, or even wants nothing to do with God that they are going to Hell. Not true! When children are young and a parent believes in God and walks the talk for the most part, kids are likely to go along for the ride. But as our children get older, their relationship with God is their own personal journey. They aren’t into God like you. Relax! Stop worrying! Your belief in a personal God suggests God will engage with them in their own journey.
The Bible doesn’t always determine what God is really like
The biggest mistake I made as a parent was believing my interpretation of the Bible was always right. My son came to me after his teachers suggested evolution was the creative process God used for the creation of humans. I was emphatic that evolution wasn’t true because of my biblical interpretation of the Bible. Turns out I could be wrong — https://biologos.org/ I could have advised what I believe, but he had to decide what he is going to believe. Besides, it can’t be proven all written down in our Bibles about God was inspired by God, that the writers always understood God perfectly.
What image of God you portray to your children is so important!
The Bible is subject to interpretation and scholars don’t agree on many moral issues addressed in the Bible. We can also determine what God is like according to one’s own moral intuitions. Your child’s view of what a moral God is like is valid. Our mental views of God shape our attitudes toward God. My view of God inspires me to pursue perfection in my relationships without being paralyzed by guilt when failing. I have the “want to” to be perfect. I believe that motivation comes from God! Surely a loving God only seeks to love you like you wish you were always able to love others. We all know how we wish our parents had loved us. This is the God you can believe. Don’t convey God is hard to please and pissed off about sin rather than what sin is doing to us.
Have a Plan!
Don’t assume that your child’s unbelief or lack of a relationship with God is one being rebellious. There are personal or intellectual reasonable objections to not believe. I was raised in a home that preached belief in God and attended church more than once a week. I didn’t have a great relationship with my parents who pushed that belief. I can’t tell you why I never turn away from God. It isn’t because I am so outstanding morally. Others turn away from God in my situation. A relationship with God is your child’s personal journey. Parents can share their personal beliefs and even encourage when younger, but eventually we must leave a child in the hands of God. Strive to have a open, loving relationship with your children.
How Do You Not Turn A Child Away From God?
Mike Edwards has been writing for Done with Religion for some time and has been a great addition to the site. He couldn’t find enough people to discuss God openly so he started blogging years ago. Mike also has his own site where he writes that can be found at What God May Really Be Like He can be contacted by email at: medwar2@gmail.com
